


Let's Get One Thing Straight, I'm Not.

by DisenchantedHelena



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gay Peter Parker, Gen, M/M, Peter comes out, Tony Stark is d o n e, established relationships - Freeform, in the most amazing ways, puns, this has been revised uwu, with this child
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2019-05-08 18:36:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14699922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DisenchantedHelena/pseuds/DisenchantedHelena
Summary: Peter is 100% gay. Now he has to find the best coming out of the closet puns ever made. Because who comes out in some normal way anymore? ..Probably lots of people, but that's not the point.Aka: The multiple times Peter comes out to the Avengers.





	1. Knock Knock, I'm Gay.

(Michelle, Shuri)

Peter groaned as he fell onto his bed, rubbing his temple. Right, after a three day crisis and making out with his crush, thankfully having his feelings returned, Peter Parker was ready to come out to his friends and family as gay. The only problem was that, well, he didn't exactly want to do it in a normal way. Almost nothing about Peter Parker was normal, so he decided his coming out should match that. He grabbed his phone and opened his group chat with Michelle and Shuri, pausing for a moment before beginning to type.

 

Peter: _Knock Knock_  
Shuri: **Who's there**  
Peter: _Me_  
MJ: Me who?  
Peter: Me, coming out to you right now. Hi i'm gay.  
Shuri: **oH SH I T**  
MJ: That was...a m a z i n g l y corny but also great.  
Peter: _. I'm gonna come out to the other Avengers later wish me luck._  
Shuri: **Do it like that and you'll be Gucci.**  
MJ: Besides, it's not like nobody there is gay.  
Peter: _True_

Peter smiled as he exited the chat. He could always depend on MJ and Shuri for three things. Encouragement, memes, and pranks. He grabbed a notebook and a pen and began to jot down notes quickly on a piece of blank paper. 

**Coming out 101**  
 _Attempt one: Knock-Knock joke_  
 _Targets: MJ and Shuri_  
 _Outcome: Successful_

Now he only needed to come out to the entirety of the Avengers. And when he phrased it like that, he realized that his head was probably going to explode.


	2. Let's Get One Thing Straight, I'm Not.

(Steve, Bucky, Tony) 

Peter Parker glanced into the living room. Steve, Bucky, and Tony. Perfect. Three was a perfectly normal number of men, two of which could probably snap his neck, and one which could kill him with tech. No, no, he was getting paranoid. These guys were family. They wouldn't kick him out or try to change him, especially because he had caught Steve and Bucky making out, unfortunately. The image was still burned into his mind.

Peter entered the room and cleared his throat. "I have a very important announcement. I...." he trailed off, trying to make it as dramatic as possible. The others gave him concerned glances. "I am.....let's get one thing straight, i'M NOT!" He grinned. The others groaned and relaxed, their concern replaced with amusement and fond annoyance. Peter was quietly relieved that none of them seemed upset with his announcement, more relieved that he wasn't dying. 

"Christ kid, thought you were going to say you had some disease. Or you were moving to Alaska or some shit," Bucky grumbled. Steve relaxed, leaning into the couch and onto Bucky's shoulder slightly. Tony rubbed his temple. Somehow he could sense this was probably going to be a thing Peter did. He still had the other Avengers to come out to, after all, and he highly doubted that he'd come out in a normal way to them. 

"Nope, just really, really fuckin' gay," Peter replied. Steve chuckled. "Welcome to the club," he replied. Tony huffed out a tiny laugh. "Okay, kid. Out or I'll let the old men start making out," he made a 'shoo' motion with his hand. Peter paled, rushing out of the room, muttering "fuck that, fuck that, fuck that," under his breath. Tony snorted at his reaction. Bucky made a mock-offended face. Steve just raised an eyebrow at Tony.

"This is going to be a thing, right?" He asked, seemingly amused by Peter's antics.

 

"Mhm."

Peter opened his notebook once he got back to his room, smirking victoriously. 

**Coming out 101**   
_Attempt 2: Dramatic pun_   
_Targets: Tony, Steve, Bucky_   
_Outcome: Successful_


	3. Cake

(Natasha, Clint) 

The day had been boring before Peter had knocked on Clint and Natasha's door. Natasha was throwing pillows at Clint every time he made a terrible pun, eventually knocking him off the couch onto the carpet. She didn't cease her fluffy assault until the knock, putting down the pillow she was holding and opening the door. The kid was standing with a bright, if somewhat mischievous expression, holding a covered platter in his hands. "I uh, made you something," he stuttered out, holding it out so that Natasha could take it. 

"I made you a cake," Peter said, grinning brightly. Natasha blinked a few times before carefully taking the platter. Peter had disappeared before she could properly thank him, which was somewhat odd. She went back into the room and set it on the table, glancing over at Clint, which had emerged from the pillows. He raised an eyebrow at her. "Peter made us a cake." The archer was by her side in seconds, which didn't surprise her.

She grabbed a few plates and pulled off the cover, revealing a circular cake with white icing and rainbow-colored words in the center. **I'm about as straight as a circle.**. The two shared an amused glance before cutting into the desert, revealing that it was, in fact, multi-layered, each a different color of the rainbow. Clint chuckled. "Wow, nobody else had an edible coming-out! I feel ripped off!" He pouted before biting into the cake. It was fucking good.

Natasha paused for a moment. "Since when can Peter cook?" She asked. Clint shrugged around a mouthful, seeming to not question it very much. Natasha decided that he probably just found a recipe online, because it did taste rather nice. "Well, I'd say it was a successful coming out," she mumbled, sitting on the couch next to Clint, unaware of Peter listening from outside the door. He grinned victoriously and pulled out his notebook. 

 

**Coming out 101**   
_Attempt three: Cake_   
_Targets: Natasha, Clint_   
_Outcome: Successful_


	4. I'm Straight..Straight Up HOMOSEXUAL! *Featuring Shuri*

(Bruce, Pepper, Tony, Shuri, T'Challa (I forgot to mention him in the tags o o p s) 

Peter and Shuri weren't anywhere in sight, which was automatically a bad sign. Tony and T'Challa were discussing tech and new inventions, Bruce casually chiming in from time to time. The two suddenly burst into the room, snickering and whispering between the two of them. The two shared a worried glance. That never meant anything good. If anything, it meant a flurry of memes that they didn't understand.

Peter coughed, drawing the attention of all the adults in the room. "We have an announcement!" Shuri declared dramatically, closing her eyes before glancing over at Peter with a mischievous smirk. Tony and T'Challa sighed and glanced over, Bruce and Pepper turned with interest mixed with amusement. Shuri put on a stoic face, just like Peter. "I am straight," they both said at the same time. Tony rubbed his temple and held up a finger as T'Challa went to ask about Michelle. Bruce raised an eyebrow and Pepper opened her mouth. 

"Straight up HOMOSEXUAL!" They added, high-fiving as they rushed out of the room, cackling. T'Challa sighed. Tony had a feeling that Shuri had done the same thing when she started dating MJ. Bruce gave Tony a 'what the hell' look, to which the billionaire shrugged. Pepper stared at the area the two teens had been standing in for a second. "Well, that's your problem, Tony." She grabbed a Starkpad and kissed his cheek before walking off. 

Well, that was most of the Avengers. Tony wondered what would be next. Maybe he'd cover his suit in rainbow glitter and dye his hair rainbow. He quietly laughed at the image of a rainbow-doused Peter.

**Coming out 101 ******  
_Attempt 4: Not straight ft. Shuri_  
_Targets: Tony, Bruce, Pepper, T'Challa_  
_Outcome: Successful_


	5. Making out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You got a boyfriend, Peter?"  
> Spiderfrost/Poki comes in for once.

The Avengers were casually sat around in the living room, watching a movie on the TV or chatting among each other. Peter was sitting oddly close to Loki. They'd kept up the appearance of close friends ever since they'd gotten together. Only the two of them knew that they were dating, excluding MJ and Shuri, for now. Thankfully, Peter had a plan that would inform them. The two shared a knowing glance and a small nod between each other. "Soo, Petey," Clint suddenly asked. "You have a boyfriend yet?" Well, that worked too. 

"Actually, I do!" He replied, smirking at their surprised expressions. He shared a quick side-glance with Loki, unnoticed by the other Avengers, who were now fully invested in Peter's romantic life. This was even better than the previous plan of just telling them. This way he got a make-out session _and_ the chance to come out one more time. 

"Ooooh," Tony chimed in, wiggling his eyebrows. "Who is it?" Peter grinned victoriously, glancing over at Loki. "Should we tell them?" Loki glanced at the confused Avengers, grinning. "I believe we should." They quickly kissed. It was short and sweet, but it seemed to get the point across to the others. Half of them seemed stuck in a shocked-state, the other half looking smug.

"Barnes, Stark," Natasha turned to the two men, who pouted and handed over $10 each. She quickly pocketed the cash, raising an eyebrow at the two surprised looking others. "What? You're not very good at hiding your eye-fucking." Both of them blushed lightly, glancing away from the woman as she shrugged.

Well, at least everyone knew very clearly that he was taken.

**Coming out 101**   
_Attempt 5: Making out_   
_Targets: Avengers_   
_Outcome: Successful_


End file.
